DUDE, YOU'RE IN MY SURF. I MUST NOW BEAT YOU UP.



Two surfer dudes, having discovered a wave-rider dude surfing on their turf, beat up and attempted to drown the wave-rider dude.



Unfortunately for the surfer dudes, their "turf" happened to be in a federal maritime jurisdiction. They are now charged with assault causing serious bodily injury.



I've been to Fort Point, where the alleged assault occurred. Wind-propelled waves come through the Golden Gate and crash against the sharpest rocks I've every seen. One must be mentally unbalanced to risk a gnarly death by surfing in such a dangerous place, so I'm not surprised to read about people beating each other up for the privilege.